Sunday, October 7, 2012

A little airplane humor


Though I Fly Through the Valley of Death, I Shall Fear No Evil. For I am at 80,000 Feet and Climbing!
(Sign over the entrance to the old SR-71 operating base Kadena, Japan)

You've never been lost until you've been lost at Mach 3.
(Paul F. Crickmore, test pilot)

The only time you have too much fuel is when you're on fire.

If the wings are traveling faster than the fuselage, it's probably a helicopter – and therefore, unsafe.

When one engine fails on a twin-engine airplane you always have enough power left to get you to the scene of the crash.

Without ammunition, the USAF would be just another expensive flying club.

Weather forecasts are horoscopes with numbers.

A smooth landing is mostly luck; two in a row is all luck; three in a row is prevarication.
 
Mankind has a perfect record in aviation; we never left anyone up there!

Flashlights are tubular metal containers kept in a flight bag for the purpose of storing dead batteries!

Flying the airplane is more important than radioing your plight to a person on the ground incapable of understanding or doing anything about it.

When a flight is proceeding incredibly well, something was forgotten.

Just remember, if you crash because of weather, your funeral will be held on a sunny day.

Advice given to RAF pilots during WWII: When a prang (crash) seems inevitable, endeavor to strike the softest, cheapest object in the vicinity as slow and gently as possible.

A pilot's job is very simple.... there are 3 lights on an aircraft, red on left wing tip, green on right wing tip, white on the tail..... Your job, as a pilot is to keep the plane between these 3 lights!!!!
(Sonny Kellum, Flight Instructor)

A pilot who doesn't have any fear probably isn't flying his plane to its maximum.
(Jon McBride, astronaut)

Never fly in the same cockpit with someone braver than you!!

If something hasn't broken on your helicopter, it's about to!!

Try to stay in the middle of the air. Do not go near the edges of it. The edges of the air can be recognized by the appearance of ground, buildings, sea, trees and interstellar space. It is much more difficult to fly there.

Blue water Navy truism: There are more planes in the ocean than submarines in the sky.
(From an old carrier sailor)


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